Shorter

I like to explore nature out in Shorter. Today I found a dead giant salamander and for like 2 hours used it as an action figure with an alive turtle. It had a red speckled belly and a black speckled back. Toby, the boxer with a humongus head, kept trying to eat it. Finally I got bored and threw it into flaming kiln. I watched it's skin boil and ooze. Finally it looked like a raisin. Then I moved on to "Teddy" the turtle. We both dozed off on the hammock waking up to the smell of Bo-Rounds. More people were here. I played with Toby for a while, then sat down to take a break. After that I went to wash my hands and completed a pointles world record. Holding 12 inchworms in one hand. Then I walked around for a few more mintes and then sat down with Teddy. Then I saw my nature raisin and went inside to wash up. I said my goodbye's and later's then left seeing the death forest. (bamboo really but the baby coming up are so spiky you could die.) I love Shorter.

I touched my uvula today! yay!

Under all your weird gross parts, uvula's the best! 
Very cool, very gross, very slimy, uvula's the best!
Under all your weird gross parts, I touched my uvula today! yay!
Love it, touch it, love it, touch it, your uvula's the best!
And then you're done touching your uvula. oh well.

the mole fairy

My mom has a mole that never to gets old to flick. And when I was about 5, we went to the the doctor to get it looked at. I wanted to keep the mole so bad, I kept asking and asking and asking if I could keep it. Well, we went into to the littler waiting room to wait some more (god bless jerry seinfeld) and the doctors finally came in to check it out. They poked "flicked" and pushed, and near the end I asked if I could keep it, but said no. To this day, I am still so mad at them. THEY DID NOT EVEN TAKE IT OFF!!!!!! What is up with society these days? Then when we left I asked if I could have the mole one more time. My mom asked me why, and I responded, "I want to put it under my pillow for the mole fairy"... I'm so weird...

my moonlight suprise

I have a kitten. Not interesting right? Well how I got her is. We were at a moon light watching party, and all of a sudden I see a cute, furry, scrawny, figure and immediately held  her for the whole entire night. (8:00-11:00) and my mom didn't know if we could keep it or not, but then said yes. Her name is Mary Jane, and is grey and white and has greenish brownish eyes, and love her because she is just, well, weird!!! She is cuddly, and likes to eat trash, and likes to share occasional snacks with me. She likes to watch TV, play in dirt, eat my hair, eat HER hair, get in my dresser drawer, lick my aquarium, play in water, wear baby clothes, and likes to sing. And that is the story of MJ the rapper I call her.

my birthday disappointment

I must start out telling you that do love cows.The sad thing about it is, if I told you much I love them, it would be the entire blog. But I will tell you this I am ten today and remember every tiny detail of  the year 2007, my 6th birthday...  I  am so nosy you would just about want to crack. So on the 17th of march I was hiding behind a tiny wall with about the tiniest piece of sleeve showing. No harm, right? Well wrong. The sacred "they" saw me and started talking all about how I was getting a mini purple cow for my birthday. Well I was so exited I began fantasizing how I was going to let it live in my room and sleep on my shoulder. It was time for my presents. waiting to see my new pet, I opened my present waiting for the mini moo, and all I had was a  stupid metal bike... No cow... But cows are truly angels. they heal your open sores.Oh and one thing, never ask me how I know that...